I too have had the example of true love from my maternal grandparents. They never took one another for granted and often shared loving glances and smiles well into their eighties.

My marriage did not resemble that at all and after agonizing for nearly 20 years – after 31 years of marriage – I’ve finally made the decision to leave. I have since met my true love, a man who shares my beliefs, my love of nature and with whom I envisioned a long and happy life.

Don’t give up! Your soul mate is out there!

(Report comment)

But remember: it’s better to be single than to be in a bad relationship attempting to salvage love.

(Report comment)

I believe the spirit you speak of is alive, but heavily protected. People don’t seem to keep to a common way, preferring to bail when things don’t look rosy. No one wants to risk opening up when so much is uncertain with other people.

Your article reminds me what’s possible, past all the sales and shopping. There are whole worlds within people when we care to look for them. We’re not really so alone, when we stop to look for the roads that lead to one another. The way in is to take a moment just to say “hello in there” (advice from John Prine).

Thank you for your piece. You always write from your heart, and it’s why your articles are so warm and thoughtful (it’s also why I enjoy this site so much). All the best!

(Report comment)

Dobry den! A very moving piece, beautifully written. This love thing is important in the essayistic branch of the travel-writing industry. It should be practiced more. I doubt it’s the case that most of us are after a cheap laugh or glib phrase, but a quick dry run with my Amazon cart found mostly books whose covers look like they were printed up by Dave Barry’s publicity department. We need more travel topics that resemble hunkering down with real love stories, in fabled settings, such as “Wuthering Heights” and “Great Expectations.”

(Report comment)

I think post-boomer generations in the Western world have been sold on the concept of love much the same way as we’re sold a car. Keep it in the garage when you’re not using it and replace it when it’s broken.

The attitude seems to have changed in a general sense. Single people I’ve talked to seem to have this belief that love is about instant compatibility, and that when two people who were “meant” to be together meet, it’s magic. So when something goes at all awry–be it a change in careers or attitudes–they brush off the whole relationship. As if being with someone is a “set it and forget it” process.

But relationships take dedication–much like the eternal dedication your grandmother gave to your grandfather while he served in Siberia.

(Report comment)