Comments on: Girlfriends Are Like Cheesecake. Wives Are Like Oxygen.

By: Natalie

Natalie — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 19:09:13 +0000

I guess men really don’t like breathing then…

By: Tabatha Smith

Tabatha Smith — Fri, 24 Jul 2009 07:18:44 +0000

Hmm, I’m interested in this idea of ‘oneness’. I’ve been married, happily, for four years, but at no point have my husband and I become ‘one’. We’re still two people and while we share a lot (we’ve just returned from traveling India, Nepal and Thailand together for six months), we’re not one and the same. We have differing opinions on things, different ideas and are essentially still our selves. And this is great! He’s the first person whose opinion I was to know, because chances are it’ll be different than mine, but insightful and interesting.
I like the oxygen simile, don’t get me wrong. However, oxygen is something I need. My husband is someone I want.

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By: Terry

Terry — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 18:01:38 +0000

Haha, cheesecake.

That just reminds me of that one scene in “Matrix Reloaded”…

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By: Olivia

Olivia — Sun, 09 Mar 2008 23:20:42 +0000

All I’m gonna say is, Javier Bardem killed with oxygen in No Country for Old Men.

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By: Ian MacLeod

Ian MacLeod — Sat, 08 Mar 2008 15:51:45 +0000

Ian, I find your your oxygen thinking interesting, but there is a very important difference between oxygen and a partner. Oxygen has no need of anything from you. A partner very much does. A partner, first and foremost, needs to feel loved and valued. Their status as the most important person in the world to you must be maintained, both in your heart and in your actions. Partnerships fail when this status evaporates, on either side.

Mine did.

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By: Madeleine

Madeleine — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 21:57:32 +0000

Ian darling, I am curious, when does a girlfriend morph into a wife? And more importantly, how? When does the saccharine sweetness of the cheesecake become essential to a man, as vital as oxygen to daily life? How does that transition occur?

Or is it more a conversation about the attitude towards women in these various roles, rather than attributes they themselves possess?

Or is it like a “types” thing, some women are cheesecake types (not the marrying kind) while others will always be oxygen?

Definitely got me thinking….and offered Adam an opening for a cheesy line when we finished reading it and I turned to him, “So, am I your cheesecake?” and he smiled and replied, “Oxygen baby, sweet sweet oxygen.”

swoon.

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By: ian mackenzie

ian mackenzie — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 21:56:27 +0000

peter – good call, absolutely marriages take work. and the summit is definitely worth it.

jacob, chris and lola, thanks for your comments. and i’m lovin’ the extended metaphors.

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By: Lola Akinmade

Lola Akinmade — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 18:21:11 +0000

Interesting way of looking at it. I do notice that one never gets burned out when hanging with your best friend. Your spouse ultimately assumes this role in your life as well.

With the boyfriend/girlfriend scenario, there’s always that underlying pressure of trying to stay decadent like a cheesecake because (subconsciously) both sides are still perusing the dessert menu.

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By: Chris H.

Chris H. — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 16:01:49 +0000

This is a fantastic simile, Ian. I happen to totally agree.

My fiance and I are getting married in June; we’ve been living together for nearly two years and even bought our own home just a few months ago.

We are in it for the long haul. We spend all of our time together, share opinions, decisions, money, etc… But we’re not just girlfriend and boyfriend, we’re going to be married in less than four months, we are a single entity, we have become one. That’s what a healthy marriage means to me.

Now if you’re too much the vagabong, and don’t want to become one with anybody, let anybody influence your decisions, are have to be held accountable by. Don’t get married!!!!!! Enjoy your cheesecake. But remember, you can’t have your cake, and eat it too!

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By: Jacob

Jacob — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 15:52:18 +0000

I can’t help but smile at the thought of my own wife’s reaction to an article comparing her to the banality of oxygen. “You’re just *there* honey! Having a girlfriend would be sweet, delicious and temporary, but you’re *constant*. And that’s so much more valuable than–*WHACK*”

I think Peter makes a great point. When you don’t have enough air, it can be sweeter than the richest cheesecake.

Great article though–in all truth, I couldn’t agree more. Single people have no idea what they’re missing. Have fun at the 1-year celebrations!

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