Comments on: Why I Disobeyed My Family and Traveled the World http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/2008/05/08/why-i-disobeyed-my-family-and-traveled-the-world/ Online travel magazine dedicated to exploring travel in the 21st century. Offering travel news, compelling interviews, online travel tools, and more. Thu, 18 Mar 2010 22:29:11 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: Alixandra http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/2008/05/08/why-i-disobeyed-my-family-and-traveled-the-world/comment-page-1/#comment-96710 Alixandra Thu, 04 Feb 2010 07:33:19 +0000 http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/?p=554#comment-96710 This article is rather similar to something I have been struggling with. While my father is a traveller himself, he did most of his traveling after he completed med school, via medical voluntourism. I am nearly finished four years of wasted university education. I say wasted not because I think education is unnecessary, but because I simply cannot find what is right for me and stick to it (resulting in three program changes, dozens of skipped lectures, and a million lame excuses). My step-mother grew up on a farm, has done her traveling almost solely since meeting my father, and would far prefer a meat-and-potatoes family gathering to encounters with new food and new people somewhere abroad. I don't think that there is anything wrong with their paths AT ALL, but I seem to be drowning in their concerns for my future. Seeing the world before slugging through an education is not (as my family unfortunately thinks) the end of my life, it will not end in regret, it will help me determine a way of turning my passions into a career and a permanent lifestyle. It literally stuns me when I think about my fellow canucks who waste their years working toward buying a house and building a fat bank account to retire on. Happy and penniless is infinitely more appealing than bored and well-funded for me, and as long as my life lies open and free, I want to do what I want to do. Respect and love for my family and their concerns is shadowing what I feel will be an incredible part of my life (hopefully somehow my entire life) and this is something I hope can be changed. Even if they can't be comfortable with my decisions, I would like to be comfortable with their doubts. This article is rather similar to something I have been struggling with. While my father is a traveller himself, he did most of his traveling after he completed med school, via medical voluntourism. I am nearly finished four years of wasted university education. I say wasted not because I think education is unnecessary, but because I simply cannot find what is right for me and stick to it (resulting in three program changes, dozens of skipped lectures, and a million lame excuses). My step-mother grew up on a farm, has done her traveling almost solely since meeting my father, and would far prefer a meat-and-potatoes family gathering to encounters with new food and new people somewhere abroad. I don’t think that there is anything wrong with their paths AT ALL, but I seem to be drowning in their concerns for my future. Seeing the world before slugging through an education is not (as my family unfortunately thinks) the end of my life, it will not end in regret, it will help me determine a way of turning my passions into a career and a permanent lifestyle. It literally stuns me when I think about my fellow canucks who waste their years working toward buying a house and building a fat bank account to retire on. Happy and penniless is infinitely more appealing than bored and well-funded for me, and as long as my life lies open and free, I want to do what I want to do. Respect and love for my family and their concerns is shadowing what I feel will be an incredible part of my life (hopefully somehow my entire life) and this is something I hope can be changed. Even if they can’t be comfortable with my decisions, I would like to be comfortable with their doubts.

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]]> By: katlyn http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/2008/05/08/why-i-disobeyed-my-family-and-traveled-the-world/comment-page-1/#comment-92352 katlyn Sun, 21 Jun 2009 01:31:36 +0000 http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/?p=554#comment-92352 Nick- Your "Real World" can be anything YOU want it to be. You just have to have the courage to make it what you want it to be. Nick-
Your “Real World” can be anything YOU want it to be. You just have to have the courage to make it what you want it to be.

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]]> By: Caroline http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/2008/05/08/why-i-disobeyed-my-family-and-traveled-the-world/comment-page-1/#comment-71185 Caroline Sun, 08 Jun 2008 12:51:53 +0000 http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/?p=554#comment-71185 I thought I would weigh in on this important topic... So here goes... Like quite a few people I took a gap year after I left school at eighteen and worked saving up money for travelling. Then I went to South America for nearly six months, doing all sorts of things from volunteering, to travelling to going to Spanish School. My parents didn't want me to go but ultimately knew it would be worse for them to forbid me. I've since returned home and am now in college aged twenty one and although my parents wish I had never gone as now I see the world in an untraditional perspective, (ie. why would I want to settle down and get a mortgage any time soon?) I've come to realise two things. One, the way I see the world and wanting to not stick to the traditional path was always there bubbling under the surface and experiencing time away out of the path just consolidated it. Two, parents are falliable, insecure and worriers. They are not perfect and if you parents are dead set against you going, its probably because they are scared for you and maybe even a little jealous that they can't just pick up and go. Put yourself in their shoes, your precious little kid (in their eyes) is taking off without a plan or a safety net. It's got to be scary for them. Ultimately going away was the best thing I ever did and I now look forward to a future that I have carved out rather than sticking to the traditional route. Just my two cents I thought I would weigh in on this important topic… So here goes…

Like quite a few people I took a gap year after I left school at eighteen and worked saving up money for travelling. Then I went to South America for nearly six months, doing all sorts of things from volunteering, to travelling to going to Spanish School. My parents didn’t want me to go but ultimately knew it would be worse for them to forbid me. I’ve since returned home and am now in college aged twenty one and although my parents wish I had never gone as now I see the world in an untraditional perspective, (ie. why would I want to settle down and get a mortgage any time soon?) I’ve come to realise two things.

One, the way I see the world and wanting to not stick to the traditional path was always there bubbling under the surface and experiencing time away out of the path just consolidated it.

Two, parents are falliable, insecure and worriers. They are not perfect and if you parents are dead set against you going, its probably because they are scared for you and maybe even a little jealous that they can’t just pick up and go. Put yourself in their shoes, your precious little kid (in their eyes) is taking off without a plan or a safety net. It’s got to be scary for them.

Ultimately going away was the best thing I ever did and I now look forward to a future that I have carved out rather than sticking to the traditional route.

Just my two cents

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]]> By: Nick http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/2008/05/08/why-i-disobeyed-my-family-and-traveled-the-world/comment-page-1/#comment-70462 Nick Tue, 03 Jun 2008 19:48:14 +0000 http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/?p=554#comment-70462 Hi first time comment, I am loving this site - really inspiring. Especially enjoyed this post I've been pushed down the career route by my parents too. I'm 18, just done my first year at university and decided never to go back to the course - its so boring and the career path only leads to more boredom and miserable routine. I've seen it - my family are the perfect example. I've decied to take a year out, save some money and then go and experiance the world outsite this empty culture. I've got the courage to disobey my parents but whenever I talk about leaving my course and travelling there is a big argument. I'm told I'm being selfish, immature, unrealistic and that I have to become part of the 'real world'. I am conflicted, are my parents completely deluded about this 'real world' and being unfair or do I have an ethical right to do something I want even if it disappoints my parents? Your thoughts please Hi first time comment, I am loving this site – really inspiring. Especially enjoyed this post

I’ve been pushed down the career route by my parents too. I’m 18, just done my first year at university and decided never to go back to the course – its so boring and the career path only leads to more boredom and miserable routine. I’ve seen it – my family are the perfect example.

I’ve decied to take a year out, save some money and then go and experiance the world outsite this empty culture. I’ve got the courage to disobey my parents but whenever I talk about leaving my course and travelling there is a big argument. I’m told I’m being selfish, immature, unrealistic and that I have to become part of the ‘real world’. I am conflicted, are my parents completely deluded about this ‘real world’ and being unfair or do I have an ethical right to do something I want even if it disappoints my parents? Your thoughts please

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]]> By: k http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/2008/05/08/why-i-disobeyed-my-family-and-traveled-the-world/comment-page-1/#comment-68611 k Fri, 23 May 2008 18:48:07 +0000 http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/?p=554#comment-68611 it's been 5 years since i graduated and i definitely haven't settled down. it only took one year of 9-5 for me to visualize my entire life behind a desk, with bad lighting, battling traffic twice a day, and dealing with petty office politics. problem is, with every passing year, i feel more and more pressure to be 'normal' (or grow up, settle down, whatever it's called) and... ugh... settle down. and as chrystine commented, i don't think the urge to travel, explore, and learn will ever go away! we only live once, right? it’s been 5 years since i graduated and i definitely haven’t settled down. it only took one year of 9-5 for me to visualize my entire life behind a desk, with bad lighting, battling traffic twice a day, and dealing with petty office politics. problem is, with every passing year, i feel more and more pressure to be ‘normal’ (or grow up, settle down, whatever it’s called) and… ugh… settle down. and as chrystine commented, i don’t think the urge to travel, explore, and learn will ever go away! we only live once, right?

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]]> By: justin http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/2008/05/08/why-i-disobeyed-my-family-and-traveled-the-world/comment-page-1/#comment-67332 justin Tue, 13 May 2008 17:21:02 +0000 http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/?p=554#comment-67332 Excellent story. Im hoping to be able to take a break from the 9-5 and travel for a while and come back and work for myself. Excellent story. Im hoping to be able to take a break from the 9-5 and travel for a while and come back and work for myself.

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]]> By: Dave Brett http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/2008/05/08/why-i-disobeyed-my-family-and-traveled-the-world/comment-page-1/#comment-67203 Dave Brett Mon, 12 May 2008 16:52:19 +0000 http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/?p=554#comment-67203 i ran away from home when i was 15 because my mum didnt want me to go, i had no choice but to just go and off to finland i went. that one trip changed my life for the better, and i learned so much from it that you cant in a class room. now im a travel presenter on the tv! its just amazing! i ran away from home when i was 15 because my mum didnt want me to go, i had no choice but to just go and off to finland i went. that one trip changed my life for the better, and i learned so much from it that you cant in a class room. now im a travel presenter on the tv! its just amazing!

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]]> By: Scribetrotter http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/2008/05/08/why-i-disobeyed-my-family-and-traveled-the-world/comment-page-1/#comment-67120 Scribetrotter Mon, 12 May 2008 07:08:01 +0000 http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/?p=554#comment-67120 I've never experienced the downside of travel, in terms of life experience. I was 43 when I quit a well-paid and secure job, to everyone's dismay. A woman, on her own, with no job?! My family was scared, my friends were shocked - at my age, I'd never find work again, would I... (though now I think some of their misgivings may have been tinged with envy) I thought I'd try it for six months, and wound up being away for three years. I became a freelance writer, and while I wasn't striking it rich, it kept me on the road. And when I decided to come back, guess what? I got a better job, with a higher salary, than the one I'd left. Even if I hadn't, my experience was the single most important thing I've ever done for myself. And I'd do it again. I’ve never experienced the downside of travel, in terms of life experience. I was 43 when I quit a well-paid and secure job, to everyone’s dismay. A woman, on her own, with no job?! My family was scared, my friends were shocked – at my age, I’d never find work again, would I… (though now I think some of their misgivings may have been tinged with envy)

I thought I’d try it for six months, and wound up being away for three years. I became a freelance writer, and while I wasn’t striking it rich, it kept me on the road.

And when I decided to come back, guess what? I got a better job, with a higher salary, than the one I’d left. Even if I hadn’t, my experience was the single most important thing I’ve ever done for myself. And I’d do it again.

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]]> By: Nomadic Matt http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/2008/05/08/why-i-disobeyed-my-family-and-traveled-the-world/comment-page-1/#comment-67027 Nomadic Matt Mon, 12 May 2008 01:11:16 +0000 http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/?p=554#comment-67027 I am also happiest traveling. But i also agree with the above poster...just a bit. the more i travel the more i realize i'll never really settle into that american supposed to lifestyle. I've met lots of people who do the gap year and then go back to do the same thing, sit in the cubicle, and move on. I think thats a shame- its like the trip was just a checklist. Not that I thin that of you. I'm just thinking outloud. great article and I can relate to a lot of what ur saying. I am also happiest traveling. But i also agree with the above poster…just a bit. the more i travel the more i realize i’ll never really settle into that american supposed to lifestyle. I’ve met lots of people who do the gap year and then go back to do the same thing, sit in the cubicle, and move on. I think thats a shame- its like the trip was just a checklist. Not that I thin that of you. I’m just thinking outloud.

great article and I can relate to a lot of what ur saying.

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]]> By: Carlo http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/2008/05/08/why-i-disobeyed-my-family-and-traveled-the-world/comment-page-1/#comment-66337 Carlo Fri, 09 May 2008 05:13:27 +0000 http://www.bravenewtraveler.com/?p=554#comment-66337 Nice article, but the first thing that struck me as odd when I started reading this was this line: "I am putting off a regular job and taking the time to find my passion before I have to settle down." On one hand you are resisting the mainstream culture of what you are "supposed" to do in life, but then you are giving in again by saying you "have to settle down". One of the biggest things that bothers me is when people say things like "it's great you are getting this out of the way before you settle down" - I am not getting anything out of the way...this is life! There is no one way to live, therefore there is no having to do anything...as long as you aren't bothering anyone else, that is. Nice article, but the first thing that struck me as odd when I started reading this was this line: “I am putting off a regular job and taking the time to find my passion before I have to settle down.” On one hand you are resisting the mainstream culture of what you are “supposed” to do in life, but then you are giving in again by saying you “have to settle down”. One of the biggest things that bothers me is when people say things like “it’s great you are getting this out of the way before you settle down” – I am not getting anything out of the way…this is life! There is no one way to live, therefore there is no having to do anything…as long as you aren’t bothering anyone else, that is.

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