Photo: aturkus
Open-minded is one thing, but being openhearted takes us to a whole other level.
Travel opens us up to other ideas, cultures, and ways of living life – this is something we all know, and more than likely is a part of the “why” we travel.
But lately I’ve been contemplating what it actually means to be open. “Open-minded” is the phrase most often associated with being receptive to that which we don’t necessarily believe or relate to, or even to that which makes us uncomfortable. But I want to reclaim a word used less often: openhearted.
Interestingly (at least to me), Merriam-Webster defines openhearted first as “candidly straightforward”, and second as “responsive to emotional appeal”. Candidly straightforward is not what I’m going for here – seems a very Western approach to a heartfelt function, doesn’t it? Instead, I think being openhearted is literally about opening your heart to that which is given – or plopped – in front of you.
I think the reason I’ve recently thought so much about being openhearted is because mine tends to get stuck in halfway closed mode. Call it life beating you over the head, or just a deeply-ingrained personality quirk, but I keep myself safeguarded. It’s seemingly easier to survive with a little protection cup over your heart.
I’ve written in the past about how you can heal a broken heart through travel. But what I’ve realized, as I begin to look back over 2009, is that I love to travel because this is the time my heart finds itself fully open to life and the world around me.
It’s almost a survival mechanism in reverse – in order to “make it” in an unfamiliar place, the walls have to come tumbling down. Sure, basic precautions around safety are a must, but the reality is, you must often rely on people you don’t know that well to make it through.
Opening To Survive
Photo: liquene
Preconceived notions (or delusions) fly out the window when it’s dark and you’ve just stepped off the plane in Dar Es Salaam without a clue of where to go. Or when the winding streets of Venice keep leading you back to the same place – nowhere near your hostel. You’re forced to ask for help.
Maybe those notions leave fastest of all when you stay up all night talking to someone you meet just hours before, revealing tidbits of both beauty and ugliness you’ve never told anyone.
Travel (of a particular kind) not only forces us out of our comfort zone, it pries open the lid under which our true self – one inextricably linked to all those with whom we share this Earth – has a chance for outward expression.
I snuck in a couple of months of travel around the US this year, and as I sit here settled for a bit, I recognize the luck in feeling that sacredness. It can be a bit hard to recreate “at home”, with all of the directions life likes to pull us, but I’m working on it.
Taking chances when the door is slightly ajar, meditating on a feeling of spaciousness in your chest, simply stopping to chat with the neighbor you’ve never spoken with before – life really is just about possibility.
Leave it to a Poet
As I was writing this, a friend posted the poem The Journey by Mary Oliver that expresses the sentiment more eloquently than I ever could:
One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice –
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
“Mend my life!”
each voice cried.
But you didn’t stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do –
determined to save
the only life you could save.
What are ways that travel has helped you open your heart? Share your thoughts below.
Community Connection
Read a very open and heartfelt letter against institutionalized racism from Matador’s Managing Editor, Julie Schwietert, to the judge who refused to marry an interracial couple in Louisiana earlier this year. And as a reminder to stay open and not pre-judge people – especially when it comes to travel writing – check out David Miller’s 8 Ways of Seeing People that Can Sabotage Your Writing.
About the Author
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9 Comments... join the discussion!
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It almost seems that open-hearted is the antithesis to open-minded. The mind wants to label and dissect and understand. The heart wants to accept, be accepted and reciprocate love. In my experience, the more I am in my head, even if it is in an effort to be open-minded, the less I can connect in the present moment with love.
If you are open-hearted, all the benefits of being open-minded come with the compassion; being more accepting of new people and ideas, but without the rationalizing judgment of the mind.
Travel has made me more open minded because it transformed me from a citizen of Port Orchard, population 8,000, to a citizen of the world, population 6.6billion +.↵ -
“In my experience, the more I am in my head, even if it is in an effort to be open-minded, the less I can connect in the present moment with love.”
So true, and something I always grapple with, as I’m unfortunately like most of society, where hanging out in my head is what I do. Ah, meditation, save me!
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Beautiful, Christine!
Yes, indeed, openhearted IS a more accurate description and we have found travel (during our open ended world tour as a family since 2006), to be an amazing, constantly heart opening experience.
I think part of it is because travel forces one to live in the “now”. One of my fave quotes is by Bryson that says it best, “To my mind, the greatest reward and luxury of travel is to be able to experience everyday things as if for the first time, to be in a position in which almost nothing is so familiar it is taken for granted”.
That keeps life in a heart opening perspective…living it almost like a perpetual 5 year old who understands the basics of life, but is ever joyful at the wonder and magnificence of life on this planet.
One is more vulnerable when traveling and forced to rely on strangers constantly for help with directions or whatever. The kindness of strangers towards us on our travels (online and in person from every country we have visited and more) has just been astounding to us & has given me even more faith in humanity and the future of our planet.
I wrote about it here – http://www.soultravelers3.com/2008/07/kindness-of-str.html
Life is sacred and traveling helps us stay more conscious of that fact, more aware of the beauty around us & in the hearts of the people near us. Continually trying to keep that perspective that we learn from travel into our every day lives is an honorable ( & think possible) goal.
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Great point about travel keeping us in the “now” – then we don’t have time to labor in our heads! We are simply being present. And thanks to the link to your piece; it’s so true when you start looking back at all the times you’ve been helped while traveling, it’s pretty amazing. I think at heart, most people want to be helpful to others, and it makes them feel as good as you getting the help!
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What a great article — I recognize this distinction, but wouldn’t have been able to put my finger on it without this article’s help. Open-mindedness implies a bit of distance… like you’re just observing something and have decided not to judge. But it’s when you get out of your head and into your heart that the best experiences come. When I’m traveling, I’m always more engaged with the people and places I see.
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This is a really great piece! Openhearted in itself in fact.
Personally, I really feel travel gives me the opportunity to get in touch with the true feelings coming from my heart. And a lot of this comes from being able to get away from work and bills and everyday worries. It feels a little bit like going back to our true nature – just living in the moment, full of wonder at the world around you. And that is always the time when the heart takes over.
Thank you Christine! This was a beautiful interlude in my Tuesday at the office
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Wow… I’m speechless. I almost cried! Thanks so much!
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@dfinepa – I’m always glad when I can help in taking a break at the office!
@Leti – Thank you!
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