Comments on: Local Culture Club: The Universal Desire to Fit In

By: Louise

Louise — Mon, 01 Feb 2010 23:29:14 +0000

Another nice article, JoAnna. It makes someone like me (not nearly as well-traveled as you) feel not so bad for not fitting in too Although I have had the experience of people in Europe assuming I and my husband are German because of the fair skin and blonde hair, which is a little disconcerting when they start talking to us in German which we don’t speak. I had to say, “no, no, we’re American!”

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By: The Longest Way Home

The Longest Way Home — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 03:56:32 +0000

Hi JoAnna,

Well done on your article. You bring up some some good points, as do the comments.

On the subject of skin. I’ve met Kenyans, and other Africans in West Africa, and discussed integration with them, and watched. They too are in a similar boat, while there is a sense of African unity, they too are classed as foreigners by locals. And why not, they are, just as I was.

Regarding ”stupid foreigner”. There’s some truth here. But not in a literal sense, in my experience. Tourist is, as tourist does. Longer term permanent expats, once settled are not so often looked at like this. Short terms who choose not to fit in, sure.

I think you’re point about not forgetting who you are is excellent. Changing for others doesn’t work. Respecting cultures yes, but don’t fake being someone else.

I very much enjoyed reading your article, thanks for the mail before hand too.

Dave

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By: Gray

Gray — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 01:10:48 +0000

As uncomfortable and frustrating as I’m sure it was at the time, I think it’s a good thing you’ve experienced this feeling of not fitting into a culture because of the color of your skin and different ways. I think everyone should experience that at some point in their life, as it makes us more empathetic to “outsiders” who come into our communities. You know? Maybe we’re a little more cognizant of the newcomer, the immigrant, maybe we are quicker to reach out a friendly hand to help them fit in and treat them like they belong. That’s the cool thing about traveling, I think–it helps us be better citizens back home, too.

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By: Lauren Quinn

Lauren Quinn — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 00:30:37 +0000

Great post–thoughtful and well-written, with a killer lede (man, we’ve all been there). It’s a complex issue that I think in some ways can’t really be resolved, but definitely needs to be discussed. Like you and Carlo said, adapting to a new culture takes generations. American-born children of immigrants I grew up with still grapple with fitting into cultures–both in the US and their parents’ countries. Thanks for an insightful, honest handling of a tough issue.

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By: Valerie

Valerie — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 19:06:11 +0000

Seconding JoAnna’s response, I definitely agree that it works the other way. My experiences in Europe made me think about the challenges my parents and grandparents probably faced when they immigrated to the U.S. And like she said, we just have to learn from these experiences and move on.

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By: JoAnna

JoAnna — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 17:42:15 +0000

Hey Carlo,

You’re totally right that Westerners are quick to dismiss immigrants as somehow being “less” than they are. And I think that a lot of the Westerners who make that assumption are probably not as well traveled as those who are more likely to meet and greet foreigners just as they would their friends.

Here’s what I’ve discovered: We’re all people. We all make mistakes. We all have emotions. And when we can look past skin color and feel free to express ourselves as we are, then everyone can learn so much more from each about the world. It’s a difficult discovery to make and a tough balance to maintain.

Thanks for your comment, Carlo. I appreciate you bringing this perspective to the discussion.

Cheers,
JoAnna

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By: Carlo

Carlo — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 02:27:26 +0000

It works the other way round too though, doesn’t it? When migrants immigrate to countries like Australia, Canada, the US, are they ever really integrated into the local culture? From the locals’ perspective, they’re always treated a little differently, right?

Except, from what I’ve seen anyway, the majority of people look down on them with superiority…”stupid foreigner” is, sadly, all too common. I don’t think that’s how other cultures look at travelers though…well, maybe they do.

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By: Abbie

Abbie — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 00:44:12 +0000

Great article JoAnna, thanks for sharing this

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By: Valerie

Valerie — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 20:33:20 +0000

Thanks for this article JoAnna. When studying abroad in Spain and France I had done my best to blend in, speaking the language whenever possible and acquiring a new wardrobe at Zara and H&M, but before long I realized that with my black hair and Asian features, there was no way I would ever be accepted as a local. Even my European-extract peers who had gone through the same trouble would still stand out. Inevitably, like you said, we had to learn to be ourselves but in the most respectable way possible.

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By: Michelle

Michelle — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 18:07:13 +0000

I’ve so had that conversation with a waiter, but in other languages. It is really frustrating, like you said. But you’re absolutely right – in the end, we are who we are.

Great article!

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